giantcornhole |
Mon Sep 17, 2012 at 12:15:57 AM
Im not "that dude" but whatever ill play ball. BAHAHA. Every1 from work was trying to fix me up with this chick and I had no clue about it. I was 18 at the time (few years ago) and they were trying to fix me up with a chick in like her mid 20s, so she was completely off my radar. Apparently she got so frustrated with try to get me to realize, everyone decided to get me drunk as SHIT! So im a plastered 18 year old who is suddenly attacked by this sober mid20 year old. haha. We eventual start a little dry humping, and this bitch is going crazy. LIKE WTF?! thought she was gunna wake my parents. Then told me to put it in. I wasnt expecting that and im not super sexual guy, so i didnt have any condoms and she wasnt on birth control. (PS. She has already had a kid) But she was like "just pull your dick out". I was like "You want me. A drunk ADD 18 year old, with minor expeirence,to pull outof a girl who already has a kid? Isnt that like slapping fate in the face" So she gets pissed and we start argueing. Keep in mind my parents are home and shes yelling "This isnt 8th grade health class anymore! PUT IT IN!" BAHAHA. to end the story, i dont have a kid. I might be a lil square and a lil bit of an alcoholic. ANd the rest of the night was awesome even though we didnt have sex. i thought it was funny.
Squint your eyes to see clearly. Blur reality to make it real. Let focus go from your deceiving eyes to know whats been concealed. We've all been blinded
|
kennyrocks |
Mon Sep 17, 2012 at 12:24:18 AM
haha dude that cracked me up
12.15.12
|
|
giantcornhole |
Mon Sep 17, 2012 at 12:33:04 AM
Ya hahaha. everything in quotes is pretty much how it went down. I was pretty gone. In my drunken state i kept calling her, a hot old milf or something haha and im sure their were a few other slurred words i said.
Squint your eyes to see clearly. Blur reality to make it real. Let focus go from your deceiving eyes to know whats been concealed. We've all been blinded
|
slipknotfan17 |
Mon Sep 17, 2012 at 12:50:11 AM
This might seem out of place to ask up here. But does anyone think it's sad that someone like me might still jerk off? Because if i had a girlfriend i would probably stop but for now i don't. Sorry just kinda wondering.
cultus diabolus laus ut flamma
|
jmg93 |
Mon Sep 17, 2012 at 1:22:17 AM
Haha not at all dude. I've had a gf for almost 7 months now, I get some twice a week if I'm lucky, and I still jerk off all the time. Don't even worry about it.
SUFFER UNTO THE LOCUST
|
MetalCrusades |
Mon Sep 17, 2012 at 1:31:40 AM
I'm still a virgin... givez a fukk
Stuff... Things...
|
Simon Fritz |
Mon Sep 17, 2012 at 2:48:24 AM
@ Slipknotfan, dude, not at all. Sometimes you just gotta blow that load to feel better lol But I don't really have any crazy / hilarious stories. I've had a few close calls were one of my gf's parents or one of her sisters almost walked in on us during the heat of the moment but thats about it.
"If it ain't metal, it's crap."
|
GregTheShowerDemon |
Mon Sep 17, 2012 at 3:07:55 AM
all im gonna say-pussy+razor blade. all im gonna say
|
GoldenGod2112 |
Mon Sep 17, 2012 at 4:20:47 AM
I have never have had sex in my 18 years of life. Someday I shall make love to my future wife to Supper's Ready by Genesis and it shall be amazing.
I don't poop that often.
|
|
giantcornhole |
Mon Sep 17, 2012 at 10:14:35 AM
Actually so far. Nobodys had a SEX story. They have been "sexual stories". We had 1 about getting head (Dont start this Clinton debate on me, whether its sex or not) And me with my drunk ass argueing at 4am. bahahaha
Squint your eyes to see clearly. Blur reality to make it real. Let focus go from your deceiving eyes to know whats been concealed. We've all been blinded
|